Crowns of Splendor

I think my recent preoccupation with senior citizens started a few weeks ago when I dropped my mom off at the airport after a visit and my eyes tracked her path from my car door to the cavernous airport entrance by keeping my eyes on her white hair. My heart was filled with gratitude that at the age of 84, she travels alone to visit us across state lines. She doesn’t have to experience the rigors of travel to get to us, but she does.

Gray hair is a crown.

According to Proverbs 16:23-23, Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained in the way of righteousness. My eyes have been paying attention to crowns of splendor these last few weeks. Hair on the heads of the elderly comes in a variety of shades — white, gray, and salt and pepper to name a few. My mom’s “crown” is white.

I have been paying attention. 

I watched a female senior citizen checking out at the grocery store this week. Something occurred that caused her to say, “oops” and our line was delayed a little bit by whatever was happening. I used the opportunity to pay attention to the two customers between her and me. Perhaps it is my imagination, but they seemed to turn away by standing sideways and not even look at her as they waited. I sensed annoyed tolerance.

I watched her at the cash register.

I admired that she was at the store alone. What occupation had she had? How many children had she birthed and raised? What wisdom did she have to share that I don’t have? I thought, “If I live long enough, that will be me someday.”

People will also look past me or avoid direct eye contact. They will not know by my outward appearance that I was a corporate trainer, professor, advocate for the incarcerated, a life-long attender of bible studies, a lover of Jesus, and educated. People might assume I am a mother, but they won’t know the story about how each child entered the world and what makes each unique, nor will they know the intense love I have for each. Without asking, no one will know the messy path I traveled to marry my current husband and how our lives have meshed into family.

I passed her in frozen foods.

On another day I came up on an older woman from behind in the frozen foods section. She was walking slowly alongside a man I supposed was a partner or husband. They seemed close. I could see her body went crooked at the hips, causing her gait to be lopsided. As I passed by and glanced sideways, her fair skin was smooth. I thought she was beautiful. I could not hear what she was saying, but I could tell she was speaking fluidly in a way that belied her physical mobility limitations.

I am an older adult.

I have gray hair too. I have paid to cover it up since the first silver strands appeared in my twenties and said hello to me in the mirror! Someday the gray will be permitted to show, but it is fully here now.

I want to be elderly.

Not really, but really. To be gray-haired means that I am alive and still here. Lord willing, I will still be living for the Lord up until I take my last breath.

By living for the Lord, I mean that I am still giving Him my life every minute of every day — as evidenced by living with excellence in all I do because God is excellent, still praying and praising Him with my lips, still having relationships with people to the extent my body and schedule allow and still living authentically with each person as a Christ follower. By God’s grace, I will never stop pointing people to Jesus or loving each person even if they don’t respond to Jesus. (It’s never our role to figure out whether a relationship with God is part of someone’s future.)

I have written in prior blogs that I hope I am leading bible studies to the end. I want to never stop regularly gathering around the bible with others, turning its pages while people use their eyes and lips to read His word aloud. I want to live Psalm 71:18-19: Even when I am old and gray, do not abandon me, O God. Let me live to tell the people of this age what your strength has accomplished, to tell about your power to all who will come. Your righteousness reaches to the heavens, O God. You have done great things. O God, who is like you?

God sees older people.

From  cradle to grave, God our Creator is delighted with our existence. God says, Even when you’re old, I’ll take care of you. Even when your hair turns gray, I’ll support you. I made you and will continue to care for you. I’ll support you and save you. (Isaiah 46:4-5) To my mom — and all the older people I watched and passed by this week — I have said prayers over you, inviting God’s care into your life.

May I cherish older people.

I can’t change the culture of my country that shies away from multi-generational relationships and homes, but I can change me. I can do more than tolerate older people or be appropriately polite. I can cherish the elderly. I can approach silver-haired people with curiosity and instant admiration because their lifetime is a treasure trove. Imagine all they have seen and done, and all the wisdom they can offer. Why would we not cherish such opportunities?

Sadly, our society is often fickle. The young can’t imagine even being old, and I understand. Ages seventy and eighty are too far away for a teenager to imagine, especially if he or she has not been interacting with older people on a daily basis in the home, as is the case for the majority of youth in America.

In addition, younger folks don’t know that the reality of being older will be here “tomorrow” in the form of wrinkles, age spots, arthritis, worn joints, hearing and sight loss, and the daily struggle of showing on the outside who we still are on the inside! Certain facets of aging can be delayed by genetics, God’s grace, Botox and medical intervention, but aging can’t be stopped. Thankfully, God is with us to the end: Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his faithful servants. (Psalm 116:15)

This week, let’s love someone who wears a crown of splendor.          

Picture Explanation: My mom interacting with my children and grandchildren. A beautiful thing!

Speaking of grappling with the realities of our life spans:       

If you are interested in being contacted to participate in a One Gritty Blink Bible study in 2023, click on the Oaks Ministries link below and contact me by email. Let’s focus on things that count for eternity!

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